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WHAT IS THIS.

This tea is bizarre. And weird. And unnerving. And completely different tasting than it initially suggests.

Ugh.

The leaves. Well, they smell great! There’s sweet, fruit-like scents, but the dominant smell is definitely mint and chocolate and rooibos. Not bad at all. I figured it’d be a mint chocolate tea with a smooth consistency, right? Right?

WRONG.

I should have known when I smelled the wet leaves and it smelled almost tart and pungent. And I thought to myself, what’s going on here? The cup smelled faintly minty, but there was definitely nothing chocolate-like going on.

So I took the first sip… and I’m mainly getting rooibos and stale apple. Like those dehydrated apple chips but not as sweet and more tart. Dehydrated Granny Smiths. There we go. This is followed not by the taste of mint, but by the sensation of mint. But it’s not a fresh feeling. Instead, it’s almost tingly, and at points, was making my throat scratchy. No chocolate was anywhere to be tasted, even though I definitely saw cocoa residue in my filter. And the touch of vanilla? Not there at all. Just weirdly tart apple mixed with pencil shavings and chased by year-old Listerine tinglyness.

Blech. I mean, it wasn’t really as offputting as it was just ultimately bizarre. My mind was expecting one thing, my taste buds were sensing another thing, and everything was upside-down.

Now I’m not sure what I’m going to be doing with the rest of it. It’s too weird to drink.